conquests and techniques; a synthesis of greatness

I have been out again. In my head i.e. Trying vigorously to fight the inertia that settles in due to work, losing reason, engineering mini-failures, deconstructing the moral fabric and shifting logistics. Each time as I decided, this was it and sat down gassy-eyed, in front of the keyboard, my fingers failed me. The mind decided to play truant and the nervous system busied itself to make all the involuntary actions as painful as possible. The words came jumbled and no matter how hard I tried, stubbornly refused to obey and stand in a coherent line.

But I did find time to pick up on a few lost strands of my life. I started watching the now long since downloaded (yes, I do indulge in occasional piracy) episodes of Heroes. I had stopped mid-way of the first season, same time last year. And though I have lost my partner in crime to the world, I decided enough was enough. I needed my dose of digitally-enhanced pulp (if at the cost of a wasteland of memories, so be it). So I crept into it with the same nervousness and perseverance found amongst gangly individuals with names like Frederick Entwistle, Esq. or Norton Bladderby, when they decide to recite scabrous prose to pimply women at hash parties.

And how I raced through it. The time warps, the monologues about the mind, the scientific impossibilities (yet), the genetic mutations and the like. I am never short of surprise at how the packaged pop culture that America has thrived on, has been so successful the world over. Before I launch into a pithy commentary on the human condition and how all of us, regardless of race and sociological patterns, essentially yearn for the same kind of powers (in this case, invisibility, ability to fly, regeneration, reading minds etc) I felt a distinct change in myself. For starters, I felt light and heady. I couldn't feel my legs (maybe that can be attributed to pins and needles) and I was strangely ecstatic. Surely, I thought, surely I too am one of them. A hero with a unique and deliberate set of abilities. And these, just like the ones in the show, are just too powerful for me to control and exploit.

For instance, my ability to procrastinate is legendary. I can postpone anything for any given period of time. Sometimes, forgetting as a whole, what I shelved in the first place. Next, is my phenomenal power to shove things under the carpet. Third, my razor sharp (or thin) will power. My emotional resistance, is probably as bad as my physical one. I am what one would call of a delicate disposition. Fourth, my belief that everything will be okay in the end. My advice to those who believe the same, is simple. Don't.

Maybe, I am being too harsh on myself. Maybe. But I am currently experiencing these powers. Sometimes, they are so strong I have no option but to submit myself to their whims and follies. With consequences, that doesn’t really need a soothsayer to predict. So I lie low, spending most of my time reading, swimming and trying to touch tennis balls with a racquet. The books look heavy. The water's too cold. And someone increased the size of the court while I was away.

If anyone of you needs my services as a hero, therefore, do call me. I seem to be available. Unless of course, my aforementioned powers take over.

That's Super Duck, the cock-eyed wonder. A comic book from the Golden Age. Drawn by staff artist Al Fagaly, I stumbled upon the exploits in the early editions of Archie Comics. And today, after many a year, I know what he might have felt like after a hard day of misadventures.